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Psalm 119:2 NLT
‘Joyful are those who obey his laws and search for him with all their hearts.’
My early Christian years were built on the assumption that I knew what I needed to do to ensure I’d receive the promises I read in scripture. The only problem was that I was sole arbiter of interpreting what the scripture said.
My interpretation is determined by me. I remain central to my own walk of faith. It is about me as opposed to the God who has firstly created and subsequently called me. I once again take control of God, when in fact I’ve chosen to live as God’s surrendered slave. For years I preached, taking responsibility for communicating hopeful and helpful encouragement to congregations around the country. Yet I cannot be sure the extent to which this was little more than the well-intentioned expression of the Christian life as seen through my personal lens. Was there rather too much of me and rather too little of God?
I went to God to resource me in my service of him, to give expression to my call. In reality I needed to take the time to discover how to meet with God, rather than thinking my quiet time was for the sole purpose of packing God into my ministry rucksack so that I was equipped to deal with every eventuality along my way. My purpose and behaviour was more informed through my own need to meet the need of another than it was about pausing and recognising my own deep need to encounter God.
My heart was more given to the service I honestly wanted to give to God than it was to God. What’s more, I wasn’t sure if I had the patience or the ability to seek after God with an increased level of intentionality. Doing so seemed to demand I decrease my level of activism. Yet, my activism was surely the clearest demonstration of my faithful commitment to God. So for many years I creatively avoided God’s invitation to draw near.
QUESTION: Is your faithfulness a reflection of your activism or quiet meditation of the things of God?
PRAYER: Lord, help me to rest and be still, know you and love you with my heart, mind, soul and body today.
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