Be Still Know
Matthew 7:22 NLT
‘On judgment day many will say to me, ‘Lord! Lord! We prophesied in your name and cast out demons in your name and performed many miracles in your name.’’
One of my perennial problems is an inner need to prove myself. It might be to prove my value or my competence or my love. Regardless, I am driven by an internal urge from which I want to feel good within myself. So the doing often has less to do with the recipient whom I may serve, produce for or love than with my own need for self-realisation. Sadly much of the Church that I have experienced seems built upon such foundations – the need for those taking the initiative to both feel good about themselves and receive the affirmation of others.
Caring for Katey caused me to implode and explode unhelpfully as well as remove me from the frontline of doing good in church and through para-church activities. I found myself gazing at my reflection, which appeared vacuous and insubstantial, and I have always been overweight physically! I wasn’t sure what I existed for, who I was, why I got up each day. I reacted against being defined as a carer; yet, perhaps for the first time I was acting more selflessly than I had at any time in my life. The column inches of Christian magazines may not have been filled with my exploits, yet the real impact and good of what I did was tangible, even when I resented my lot.
Jesus points out that we may approach the throne of grace with an impressive and impeccable CV, yet God remains unimpressed. Yes, all that good stuff has been done in God’s name and for his benefit, yet there never was any doubt over God’s name, nor does he require anything done on his behalf. It is the manner in which we live that ultimately gets weighed in God’s balance. Many who impress with their acts of godliness may one day meet with an unwelcome surprise. Many others who have groaned within the sheer ordinariness of life and been most reluctant in the midst of their service will be pleasantly surprised.
QUESTION: How much do you yearn to make an impression for God?
PRAYER: Lord, may I do nothing out of selfish ambition, but only that which pleases you.